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I'm Amber, a caffeine addicted, blue-haired writer. I like flowers, dogs, and giraffes.

1. When you cut yourself, clean and bandage it.

2. Do not start smoking cigarettes because the boy who broke your heart does.

3. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.

4. Cutting calories doesn’t do anything but make you unhappy.

5. If the number on the scale rises, throw it out.

6. The first girl you ever “date” is going to call the police on you even though she lives three thousand miles away, because you’re going to tell her that you’re not in a good mental state shortly after you’ve “broken up”.

7. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.

8. Break up with the boy who says, “You had a sexy phase!” when you tell him that you’ve dated a girl before.

9. Dating your friends is not always the best idea, but you can still be friends after you’ve broken up with her.

10. Your mother will try to become your best friend because you’re leaving for college soon. Let her.

11. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.

12. Your closest friend will stop talking to you when you leave for college.

13. It’s okay to cry.

14. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.

15. When you cut yourself again, clean and bandage it. Do not be ashamed.

16. Your anxiety is going to try and control your entire life. Tell it to shut the hell up, because you’re trying to live and that task is hard enough as it is.

17. The past has a funny way of coming back in the form of you developing a crush on another friend.

18. Try not to hate yourself for breaking up with your boyfriend.

19. If you’re still smoking, apologize silently to your mother.

20. When you want to kill yourself, don’t.

If you wear thongs, I both admire and fear you

Thongs are so uncomfortable how can anyone wear them for long

I like the Girl Code especially because it doesn’t make me feel bad about sex.

mistervelanna:

wonder-troll:

Act your age

u are banned from reblogging this post nani
BANNED

mistervelanna:

wonder-troll:

Act your age

u are banned from reblogging this post nani

BANNED

I sent a request to volunteer at the Humane Society and I really really hope they need extra help because I really want to do it.

shes-a-maslaniac:

idk why anyone would be interested in me romantically i literally watch netflix, complain, and wear the same four to five outfits with different mixes and matches all the time

aimmyarrowshigh:

therewere13possibilities:

How I Met My Consolation Prize

How We Destroyed 9 Seasons Worth of Character Development

How Your Mom is Basically Another Girl That I Banged

How I Got Over Robin — Oh, Just Kidding

How We Fridged Your Mother

How I Met The Plot Device

How Even Women Whose Names I Don’t Remember Got More Mentions Than Your Mother

the-whiskers-come-within:

HES SO HAPPY THAT PHIL CALLED OMG

the-whiskers-come-within:

HES SO HAPPY THAT PHIL CALLED OMG

danwin:

Cat: just thinkin’ bout life

nessuno:

thelegendofben:

hogglette:

oh hey link what’s up little guy

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you don’t look so hot. you have a headache?

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well let’s take a look see

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holy shit

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holy SHIT

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it’s a boy. omg i’m a grandma

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i’m so proud

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wat

whAT